The Last Great Adventure

I attended a memorial last week. The man had a long, prosperous life, he loved his family and spent his life in service of Jesus. He died surrounded by family. He knew the value of hard work and left a legacy in his absence. I never knew him personally - I went in support of his family - but I was deeply moved.

While watching his sons honour him on stage, standing beside one another and fighting back tears, I found myself wondering what people would say at my memorial. This may seem morbid, but it’s something I ponder often. I already have my funeral songs picked out. It is important to me that God is glorified in my absence and that the people I love worship Him in remembrance of me.

I also have a somewhat nuanced view of death. It does not scare me. In fact, it excites me. It feels like this grand adventure that we will all embark on one day. All it takes is listening to Hymn of Heaven by Phil Wickham (one of my funeral songs, by the way) for me to get excited about spending eternity with God in paradise. I can’t wait for the new earth, where we will be able to witness creation as it was intended, and walk in the garden with God.

Now, I know that death is sad for the people left behind, because we must now navigate the rest of our lives on earth without the loved one that we lost. It is also important to feel grief and to mourn appropriately - the loss is real. It’s just not forever.

For me, death is only truly devastating when the departed never knew Jesus. But even in those cases, we do not truly know where they end up. God loves us so deeply that I am certain He doesn’t let His children go easily. Luckily, I am not the judge.

Even when someone is taken home at a young age, it is incredibly hard on their loved ones. But regardless of whether we get 9 or 90 years on this earth, it is but a breath and then it is over. Our lives should not be measured by the number of days we live, but rather by the people we touched and the life we lived while we were here.

Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. ~ James 4:14 ~

I also found myself wondering who I would want to speak at my funeral. I would want the people who knew me best and whom I loved most. My friends, for one - those who have seen me through the good and the bad, and with whom I can laugh with well into old age. My siblings, my built-in best friends, who have seen the best… and the worst of me. My husband (someday), who will be my greatest partner in crime and confidant. And lastly, my children (also hypothetical), whom I hope I will raise well and will carry the best parts of me forward.

I recently read Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. In the first book, he reflects on the people in his life and the admirable qualities they possessed - things he valued and aspired to embody himself. I want to try to do something similar here. Because as wonderful as it is to honour someone after they are gone, people should also be honoured while they are still living.

Immediate Family

Clinton, my dad - a man of unmatched integrity and heart. He leads by example, bringing a level-headedness and clarity that is is rare. His life is rooted in faith and family; everything else is secondary.

Debra-Lee, my mom - someone who was truly born to be a mother, not just to her own children but to countless others. With a gift for hospitality and service that is seldom seen, she operates from the heart, welcoming people in without expecting anything in return.

Nicole, my sister - I have never known a better encourager. She lives to lift people up. Her joy and fun bubble over, and she never fails to leave people better than she found them.

Michael, my brother - a true gentleman with the heart of a king. He lives up to his name: a protector and a warrior who loves with his whole heart. He is my ride-or-die.

Grandparents

Sonja, my grandmother, whose gentleness is unmatched. She always puts the needs of others above her own. Her quiet strength and kindness bring calm to everyone she encounters.

Emil, my grandfather, has a strong sense of justice and works to make the world a place of goodness. He uses his skills as a mechanic to serve those in need, purely out of generosity.

Thomas, my grandfather, who is happiest standing beside a sports field supporting his grandkids, has discipled many people throughout his life. He has been generous with his time, using it to support his family and spread the gospel of Jesus.

Sandra, my grandmother, who was most at home when surrounded by her family. She lived her life for others and was a fierce protector. Her contagious laugh is one we remember long after she is gone.

Friends

Amy - her work ethic and focus are something to admire. She makes you feel seen like no one else, listening without judgment and offering wise counsel, while still being able to laugh and be silly.

Justine - her steadfast spirit and gentleness bring peace to those around her. Her sense of adventure and resilience in the face of hardship make her the ultimate partner in crime.

Sam - fiercely loyal and self-sacrificing when it comes to those she loves, giving generously of her time and resources and holding nothing back.

Beth - her calming presence and legendary hugs make you feel loved beyond measure. She processes things thoughtfully and makes informed decisions rather than purely emotional ones—one of the great stoics of our time.

Thone - a mother if there ever was one, loving her family and friends with her whole heart. Through time and distance, she remains loyal and steadfast.

Tehan - always there to bring the fun, capable of making me laugh even when all I want to do is cry. His work ethic and family loyalty make him a man of great worth.

Chrisli - her wisdom and discernment make her the perfect confidant. She is the strength of her family and the joy of her husband.

Blake - a leader of men and a servant of God. His humility and love for the Lord make him one of the heroes of the faith.

Rob - taking the gospel to the far reaches, serving God while loving life. He carries peace and brings calm to chaos, reflecting God’s heart in all he does.

Steph - with faith that can move mountains and the courage of David. She serves God wholeheartedly, knowing where her help comes from while always finding beauty in creation.

Sarah – her thoughtfulness and deep joy make her a pleasure to be around. She radiates beauty from the inside out and has remained steadfast through trying times, unwavering in her hope for the future.

Tyron - combining his love for nature and people to serve the kingdom. Working quietly behind the scenes without seeking recognition, his words - though few - carry weight.

Cousins

Caleb - his perseverance through hardship and positive attitude are remarkable. He trusts the promises of God and worships faithfully in the waiting.

Chad - he carries wisdom and mystery. His sense of humour and contagious laugh leave people joyful and uplifted.

Matt - name a more genuine person and I will be amazed. He authentically loves his Father in heaven and serves Him by serving His people wholeheartedly.

There are others I have not mentioned yet - people I will honour another day. But the above people have inspired me and left me better than they found me. I am grateful to have people in my life who are truly there for the long haul - people I can count on.

This may seem a little off topic, considering I started by talking about a memorial, but for me it is all connected. How we live determines how we are remembered.

I know I will never get it quite right, but I intend to spend the rest of my life trying to be more like Jesus, with a little help from my friends (queue music).

As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. ~Proverbs 27:17~

Who we spend our lives with matters.

There is a quote that says, “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.” Whether we like it or not, this statement proves true time and time again.

So, my challenge is this:

Who are you choosing to spend your time with?

Are they helping you become more like Jesus?

And how do you want to be remembered when you begin your final, glorious adventure and God calls you home?